I think it’s safe to say, the summer’s adventures have begun! After months of considering, planning (unplanning), and attempted preparing, I am now, officially, just traveling.
On the beach at Napili Bay, one of my old favorite spots, I realize that I’ve underestimated the depth and vividness of my memories. Ever since flying into Maui, I’ve been experiencing flooding memories of my previous time spent here, and in general of what was going on in my life then. Almost exactly seven years ago, about 6 months after Chris had passed away, I was lucky enough to spend some time floating between Maui and Oahu. My crash pad in Maui was just up the street from Napili Bay, so upon arriving today, I decided to take a walk through the entire area.
As I walked, reflecting on that bittersweet time in my life, I realized that I was but a child (only weeks after turning 21), with way too much money and heartbreak to know what to do with myself. I don’t regret any of it, and though I quickly burned through the money I had, I can see that I was doing the best I could to find beauty, joy, and fun in life; reminiscing on those fond memories, I would say that I was pretty successful. At times I’ve wondered if maybe my vulnerability made me susceptible to being taken advantage of, but I can recognize that any exploitation was mutual and welcomed.
When I made it out to the farthest northern point of the bay, I decided to meditate, and when I did, I found I was able to release/regain some of the energy I’d left in those places. Have you ever felt like you left a piece of your heart somewhere? I definitely have, and returning here has shown those pieces to me.
My sister and I have been talking about how we’ve both returned to places of our past, in preparation for our future, so as to collect the energy we’ve left behind and close any chapters left unfinished. During my meditation, I was specifically working that energetic concept, and witnessed that it’s not so much a gathering of energy, as it is a transformation.
As the energy transformed, I felt as though pieces of my heart will no longer be left here, but Maui (these places and memories) will always have a place in a piece of my heart.
In light of the fact that in my program I’ve recently been working and transforming these remnant energies of my experiences with Chris, it turned out that Hawaii being my first stop on this new adventures was synchronistically ideal.
Seven years later, I find myself in a similar position – relatively unemployed, with money saved, and a burning desire to travel and explore. The difference is this time, rather than running from the heartbreak of my past, I’m running towards the promise and hope of my future.
(Hello, goodbye, I love you)
Stories from the road-trip that inspired moving to the PNW, and other travel adventures.